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not sure what happened

i know i have a bum system, a refurbished toshiba laptop, but i don't know why it went beserk all of a sudden. all of a sudden though, internet explorer 32-bit version will only start, hang for 15-20 seconds then crash. x64 versions of IE will open stably but not connect to internet services, yahoo, bing, not a single web site. I wound up installing and removing the internet explorer feature several times trying to get whatever debunked configuration setting was going on to reset, but to no avail so I uninstalled IE 10 to no avail, 9 performs the same useless attempts at running. Unfortunately, this isn't the only isolated issue with my laptop either, the cd-drive keeps showing and unshowing itself in explorer windows, and I managed to fix it the first time just by running update. I assumed it was from a failed configuration from a previous update, I had my computer freeze. Anyhow, I thought uninstalling IE and running update might fix the issue, but windows update will not operate either. It says windows cannot check for updates because the service is not running, but with all the dependencies for the Windows update service displayed as started, windows update will not turn on whether I set it to manual and try to start the service, or set it to automatic and reboot. I thought it could be PNRP as a network policy, but that didn't do anything either, in fact it wouldn't turn on at first. I ran malware scanners, avira which showed nothing and zone alarm which said I had a trojan in a browser that I had been running for a week or so, Comodo's Comodo Dragon. I uninstalled it and everything I downloaded, tried running from last known good configuration, running check disk to see if some important file had been orphaned and sfc /scannow. nothing, nada, zip. just a bum laptop. it's gonna get replaced but not right now. any suggestions on how I can get it going for browsing and text processing without internet access?

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